"Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous"-Corinthians 13.
It is 2:30am, just had a talk with a friend. I don't really know how I feel about it. Maybe that is the problem. I don't know how I feel. The thing about love is sometimes what you want isn't really what you need... Or actually anybody's need. It is even more ridiculous because I play out these stupid scenarios in my head over and over again like a broken cassette player that won't stop. Sometimes I feel like I am beginning to get somewhere, then all it takes is a little reminder and I fall right back to where I started. I feel like I ended everything on a bad note, like a melody that wasn't finished or a blank patch on the canvas. I want to paint something new, but the uncertainty haunts me because following the brush strokes of a familiar path seem much more comfortable. I don't know why I keep on having these dilemmas, maybe I am just a fool that doesn't want to face the truth. Maybe that is why I left a blank spot on the canvas. I don't want to know the end when everything is concluded. I don't want to know how the picture is suppose to end. Even if I can paint that blank spot however I desire, I don't trust myself enough... Because I don't know what I want anymore. I want to change for the better, but tell me why do I feel this way...
